Motherhood is a prisoner of stereotyped discourse that condemns us as bad mothers for not looking after and giving sufficient time to our children or as failed professionals for not ensuring our non-stop availability for work. Success or survival in the work place is virtually incompatible with having offspring. It is always our fault. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Women face pressure on two fronts: pressure to be selfless mothers, as dictated by the patriarchal mantra, and pressure to succeed in the labour market, building a successful career without renouncing having children, as established by the rules of neoliberal capitalism. However, in most cases it is a matter of surviving as best one can in unstable jobs. The option of motherhood is reduced to two archetypes: the \u2018angel of the home\u2019 or \u2018superwoman\u2019. Both models fit nicely into the system, whichever we are expected to follow. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
History has seen the generalisation of a certain ideal of the good mother, one who first serves her child and then her husband. The myth of the perfect mother who is devoted, married, monogamous, selfless and happy in her role, and who always puts others’ interests first as she is not supposed to have any of her own. A myth that is presented as timeless, when in fact its foundations are specific to western modernity. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Based on this ideological construct, the patriarchal and capitalist system has relegated mothers to the private, invisible sphere of the home, undervaluing their work and consolidating gender inequalities. Women have no choice other than childbirth, as dictated by biology, their social duty and religion. An argument, based on biological destiny, which has served to hide the huge amount of reproductive work carried out by women. The patriarchy reduced femininity to motherhood, and women to the condition of mothers. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
During the 20th century, the mass incorporation of women into the labour market (and the corresponding financial autonomy), the generalisation of a model of urban society where less pressure is placed on individuals, and access to contraceptive methods turned having children into an option rather than an obligation. But when motherhood stopped being women\u2019s only destiny, the dilemma of motherhood emerged, i.e. a choice and desire that was hard to square with others. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
From the 1980s, while more and more women joined the labour market, a public pro-motherhood and pro-family discourse became more widespread. The ideal of the good mother became much more complex and plural. Women were no longer devoted mothers, as they had been until then, but now became \u2018super mums\u2019 [1]<\/a>1 \u2014 WOLF, N. Misconceptions: Truth, Lies, and the Unexpected on the Journey to Motherhood. Nova York: Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group, 2003\n<\/span><\/span>, as selfless as ever, while also having an active working and public life and, of course, a perfect body. This is the \u2018new momism\u2019 [2]<\/a>2 \u2014 DOUGLAS, S. J.; MICHAELS, M. W. The Mommy Myth: The Idealization of Motherhood and How It Has Undermined Women. Nova York: Free Press, 2004\n<\/span><\/span>, an unattainable motherhood that devalues what real mothers actually do. The result is frustration and anxiety. Motherhood suffers from a neoliberal intensification that mixes consumerist culture with middle-class imaginaries <\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n Women face pressure on two fronts: pressure to be selfless mothers, as dictated by the patriarchal mantra, and pressure to succeed in the labour market, building a successful career without renouncing having children, as established by the rules of neoliberal capitalism <\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n Historically, motherhood and feminism have shared a complex relationship. The second wave of feminism in the 1960s and \u201870s launched a much needed rebellion against the glorification of motherhood and the sanctity of the nuclear family, in the context of society\u2019s conservative sexual morality. Its target was the ideal of sacred motherhood and the patriarchal family model and it demanded sexuality beyond reproduction and the right for women to decide over their own bodies. Major advances were made in contraception and the right to abortion, along with significant sociocultural changes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n However, this rebellion ended in a tense, poorly resolved relationship with motherhood; in some cases denying or disdaining it, in others, even developing a discourse that was anti-reproduction. This should not be that surprising. Motherhood has been used by the patriarchy and capitalism as an instrument for the subjection and control of women, forcing them towards the domestic, private and invisible environment. Motherhood, as an obligation, has acted as a brake on women\u2019s aspirations and as an obstacle to equality and autonomy. Women\u2019s liberation meant leaving the home, putting aside childrearing and entering the labour market. By achieving economic independence, it was thought that the problem of motherhood would disappear, and there was no desire for further reflection on the matter. The dilemmas and contradictions of motherhood entangled feminism. <\/p>\n\n\n\n From the mid-1970s, feminism took on the challenge of considering motherhood in a positive light. Once motherhood had been rejected as a destiny, some intellectuals and activists tried to view it from another perspective. The aim was to go beyond the simple negation of motherhood and move the burden of childrearing onto the state or to externalise reproduction. Adrienne Rich\u2019s theses in Of Woman Born<\/em> enabled feminists to reconcile themselves with motherhood. Her main contribution was to distinguish between the institution of motherhood that generates submission, as imposed by the patriarchy, and women\u2019s potential relationship with the experience of motherhood, establishing a clear distinction between the harm of the former and the virtues of the latter. <\/p>\n\n\n\n In Rich\u2019s opinion, it was not a matter or rejecting motherhood, but of rejecting how it was defined, imposed and restricted by the patriarchy, whereby \u201cthe idea of maternal power has been domesticated\u201d. The \u201cinstitution of motherhood\u201d needed to be abolished, to place motherhood outside the sphere of the patriarchy. This did not mean \u201cabolishing motherhood\u201d, but rather releasing \u201cthe creation and sustenance of life into the same realm of decision, struggle, surprise, imagination, and conscious intelligence as any other difficult, but freely chosen work\u201d [3]<\/a>3 \u2014 RICH, A. Nacemos de mujer. La maternidad c\u00f3mo experiencia e instituci\u00f3n. Madrid: Traficantes de sue\u00f1os, 2019 (1976), pp. 356.\n<\/span><\/span>. Unlike other feminists who identified the reproductive capacity of the female body as a barrier to emancipation, Rich defended women\u2019s physicality \u201cas a resource, rather than a destiny\u201d[4]<\/a>4 \u2014 Ibid, pp. 84.\u00a0\n<\/span><\/span>. Women\u2019s liberation meant defending and highlighting female sexual, reproductive and maternal potential, as opposed to forced motherhood. <\/p>\n\n\n\n In the context of a crisis of civilisation, motherhood today is experiencing its own crises. We see this in the increasing difficulties women find in getting pregnant, in putting off or even involuntarily renouncing motherhood, the juggling act of balancing childrearing with work, the tensions in their life project, the impossibility of having the number of children they would like, dissatisfaction with the experience of motherhood and self-guilt. These are just some examples of the multiple, invisible and unnamed crises of motherhood. Viewing motherhood from the feminist perspective means rescuing it from its crises and rescuing ourselves from the crisis of motherhood. <\/p>\n\n\n\n But what is feminist motherhood? Mothers have historically been considered objects, not autonomous individuals. Seeing ourselves as independent subjects with our own needs is one of the challenges for feminist reflection on motherhood. A feminist, disobedient mother is one who breaks with the imposed ideals of motherhood, but who does not renounce the experience of motherhood; she defends her role as an active subject with the capacity to decide; and she reconciles herself with her physicality, empowering herself in pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding. As Rich states, this is motherhood outside the law and the institution of motherhood [5]<\/a>5 \u2014 Ibid, pp. 264.\u00a0\n<\/span><\/span>, cosa que implica una confrontaci\u00f3 constant amb les normes socials establertes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If we accept the feminist principle that the personal is political, the challenge lies in the emancipatory politicisation of motherhood. It is not a matter of idealising or romanticising it, but rather of recognising its fundamental role in social reproduction and realising its true value. It is high time that we adopted new codes and freed motherhood from the patriarchy. Women won the right not to be mothers, abolishing motherhood as a destiny, now the challenge is to decide how we want to live the experience. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Today\u2019s new generation of women and mothers, undoubtedly free of the stereotypes of previous generations, demand visibility and recognition for work that women have been doing for centuries. It is not an offensive by the patriarchy to send us back into the home, as some feminists have suggested [6]<\/a>6 \u2014 BADINTER, E.\u00a0La mujer y la madre. Madrid: La esfera de los libros, 2011.\u00a0\n<\/span><\/span>, sin\u00f3 de la presa de consci\u00e8ncia de com unes pr\u00e0ctiques tan rellevants per a les societats humanes com s\u00f3n gestar, parir, alletar i criar, han estat relegades als marges, i de la necessitat de valorar-les, visibilitzar-les p\u00fablicament i pol\u00edticament i reivindicar-ne la responsabilitat col\u00b7lectiva, d’homes i dones, en el marc d\u2019un projecte social emancipador. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The new decommodified and ecologist feminist motherhoods can be viewed in the context of the debate on the commons and the commonweal. Experiences such as breastfeeding support groups or shared childrearing collectives do not represent a backward step in terms of identity; rather they are defensive projects supporting certain rights and the chance to experience motherhood differently, in the context of the commodification of life and consumerist values, as well as an offensive project to reorganise daily life around other parameters. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Alternative motherhood does not simply mean \u2018lifestyle politics\u2019, i.e. another style of life and motherhood only accessible to the middle and upper classes; rather, it implies highlighting the close links between neoliberalism and motherhood, how the former impedes experience of the latter. It is about gaining changes in the labour market, public services, the family institution and, in short, the model of social reproduction. A different type of motherhood requires a different type of society. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If motherhood is considered a personal decision, then responsibility falls entirely on the individual mother, thus hiding inequalities whereby the experience is perceived very differently depending on the woman\u2019s socioeconomic position and ethnicity <\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n Whether we want it to or not, our socioeconomic environment shapes what we can do and restricts our options. We need to avoid establishing an unachievable ideal of motherhood that generates discontent and guilt. Emancipatory motherhoods often share the same space and affinity with initiatives in ecological consumption, non-authoritarian educational models and social and solidarity economy networks, among others, and their strengths and limits are similar to these movements. Above and beyond a personal choice, the challenge lies in placing these proposals in the context of a broader social project of system change. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If motherhood is considered a personal decision, then responsibility falls entirely on the individual mother, thus hiding inequalities whereby the experience is perceived very differently depending on the woman\u2019s socioeconomic position and ethnicity. The ambivalence [7]<\/a>7 \u2014 RICH, A.,\u00a0op.cit.; LAZARRE, J.,\u00a0El nudo materno. Barcelona: Editorial Las Afueras, 2018 (1976).\n<\/span><\/span>, intrinsic to motherhood is deeply shaped by this issue. <\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n Thus, while well-educated, upper and middle-class women frequently discuss how to balance motherhood and their careers and how to incorporate the new role of mother into their own identity, working class women struggle to feed and clothe their children while barely making ends meet and to look after them while trying to hold down highly precarious jobs. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Motherhood is not an individual private practice, however much this message is repeated; it is a public matter, which has political and collective repercussions. From the feminist perspective, it is essential to de-individualise motherhood and emphasise that its difficulties are not just due to gender discrimination but also to the intersection of other oppressions of class and ethnicity. In short, motherhood depends on how social reproduction is organised. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Childrearing and motherhood must be resocialised; they are not private or family affairs [8]<\/a>8 \u2014 DEL OLMO, C.,\u00a0\u00bfD\u00f3nde est\u00e1 mi tribu? Maternidad y crianza en una sociedad individualista. Madrid: Clave Intelectual, 2014.\n<\/span><\/span>. It is not a matter of questioning the care given by a specific mother or father, as our decisions are deeply influenced by a hostile socioeconomic and labour environment, but rather one of discussing which system guarantees the right to care. This is where the main debate on childrearing should lie, although such discussions tend to ignore structural determinants. Another form of care will only be possible in an alternative social model, which implies asking what type of personal relations, labour market, community initiatives and public services we need to make it feasible. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Carrying out politics that favour motherhood does not mean legislating to make family and work life compatible, by, for instance, providing longer maternity and paternity leave, but creating the socioeconomic conditions in which people can have children when they want. One of the main reasons why people have fewer and fewer children or have them when they are much older is the increase in work and life precarity. If you cannot make ends meet, if you cannot pay your mortgage or rent, if your job is unstable, then it is difficult to even consider having children. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Rising poverty and precarity mean that Spanish women are the oldest in the world when it comes to having their first child, at 32.1 years of age [9]<\/a>9 \u2014 INE. \u00abMovimiento natural de la poblaci\u00f3n (nacimientos, defunciones y matrimonios). Indicadores demogr\u00e1ficos b\u00e1sicos a\u00f1o 2017. Datos provisionales\u00bb (19\u00a0juny\u00a02018) [nota de\u00a0premsa]\n<\/span><\/span>. In Catalonia, women aged 35 to 39 give birth to more children than those aged 25 to 29 [10]<\/a>10 \u2014 IDESCAT. \u00abEstad\u00edstica de\u00a0naixements\u00a02017\u00bb (27\u00a0setembre\u00a02018) [nota de\u00a0premsa]\n<\/span><\/span>. A world organised around business interests is hostile to life. It is also reckoned that one in four women born in 1975 will not have children, and for most of them this will be because they cannot get pregnant for socioeconomic reasons, lack of a partner (although an increasing number of women are single mothers through choice) or problems of infertility [11]<\/a>11 \u2014 ESTEVE, A.; DEVOLDER, D.; DOMINGO, A. \u00abLa infecundidad en Espa\u00f1a:\u00a0tic-tac, tic-tac, tic tac!!!\u00bb.\u00a0Perspectives\u00a0Demogr\u00e0fiques, n\u00fam. 1 (2016), p. 1-4.\n<\/span><\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Carrying out politics that favour motherhood means combating speculation in the housing market, abolishing labour precarity and reducing the length of the working day without cutting wages, so more time can be given to personal and family life. Defending motherhood should be a policy inherent in egalitarian and liberation ideologies, which instead seem to be towed along by conservative and\/or liberal sectors, simply identifying motherhood as a burden, in both personal and labour terms. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The real problem is not motherhood, as has been repeatedly pointed out, but a socioeconomic system that is hostile to life. It is not a matter of adapting motherhood to work (as in the case of maternity leave as short as 16 weeks, not even long enough to breastfeed an infant exclusively during the first six months of life, as recommended by all health institutions) but rather of adapting paid work to motherhood and childrearing. I do not intend here to judge mothers who want to return to work once their leave is over; the issue is that someone who wants longer maternity leave should still be guaranteed this right. And this is what all political parties seem to have forgotten. Defending motherhood means defending life, care, bonds and affection, and this must be done from an egalitarian, progressive perspective. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The transformations in motherhood, from both the social and personal point of view, have correlations in fatherhood. The father figure, in traditional parental systems, has been defined in relation to that of the mother, but throughout history both functions have been conceived asymmetrically, socially and culturally. While the paternal role has been raised to the category of spiritual principle, bestowing on the man absolute authority over the descendants, the maternal role has been naturalised. <\/p>\n\n\n\nFeminism and the experience of motherhood <\/h5>\n\n\n\n
To the rescue <\/h5>\n\n\n\n
Communal childrearing <\/h5>\n\n\n\n
Politics to favour motherhood <\/h5>\n\n\n\n
Maternalising fatherhood <\/h5>\n\n\n\n